The Surprise of a Lifetime

Staci S. Wright

meg-nicole

Megan and Nicole dreamt of starting to be mothers a person day, but almost nothing could have geared up them for how their journey to parenthood unfolded. From first discussions with an OB/GYN to working with a fertility clinic, discovering their family members-creating possibilities, a shocking pregnancy, and welcoming their minimal ones, they took a person action at a time and saved moving ahead.

This is their story, instructed in Megan”s personal text. Enjoy!

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Household Scheduling as an LGBTQ+ Few

The two of us have often acknowledged that we needed to be mothers. I normally realized that I wanted to have youngsters, while Nicole always knew that she didn’t. It was in essence a match manufactured in LBGTQ+ heaven when it arrived to relatives setting up.

Take note: Lots of LGBTQ+ couples come to a decision early on about which lover will try pregnancy first (because of to age, genetics or other factors), and some, like Megan and Nicole, know that only a single of them wants to have a being pregnant. These are vital choices to focus on with your OB/GYN or fertility specialist! 

Clearly we cannot have any “oopsie babies,” and have to go as a result of some substantial scheduling in get to have small children. We knew that we needed to start off the procedure in Slide 2021 as Nicole was finishing up her Master’s degree, once she did not have school using up all her time anymore.

I (Megan) talked with my OB/GYN at my yearly verify-up in 2020, and was told to call her again about 2-3 months in advance of we wanted to start off the process. My OB/GYN advisable we operate with Illume Fertility (previously RMA of Connecticut), and we kept the fertility clinic’s name in our back pocket as we started collecting much more data about relatives making.

Finding Insight from Buddies

We spoke with some college or university acquaintances who are also LBGTQ+ and have a few children of their personal, considering the fact that there is very little information and facts easily obtainable out there. Luckily, they had been pretty prepared to present some details and insight into how they started off their household.

We also talked with some shut friends who were just commencing their method with Illume (they welcomed a beautiful baby female just a thirty day period before us), and they gave us some a lot more information on the different exams that they had to go via, and gave additional particular insight into fertility therapy.


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Pictures: Spoiler notify! Megan & Nicole announce their being pregnant.


At-House Insemination vs Fertility Clinic

We initially deemed striving to conceive on our personal at residence, but then resolved that there had been as well quite a few unfamiliar variables with that course of action, like how to get the sperm vials to our household, what the very best syringe is, when in my cycle we should do the insemination, if we required to use many vials and try out on multiple times to enhance our odds of obtaining expecting, thinking if I was even fertile or if there was something relating to about my reproductive program, etc.

All of these unknowns led us to stick to the referral to Illume, and begin our spouse and children-creating process with the assistance of authorities.

Building a Strategy with Our Workforce

We 1st satisfied with reproductive endocrinologist Dr. Cynthia Murdock for a digital consultation in August 2021, and right away understood that we wanted to continue on with her as our medical doctor. We mentioned that for this pregnancy we desired to use my (Megan’s) eggs, but in the future, we would want to take into consideration utilizing Nicole’s and try reciprocal IVF.

Dr. Murdock and her team quickly established up all of the appointments we have been going to want, from genetic testing, blood function, and ultrasounds, to the consults with the social employee and the genetic counselor.

We have been pretty thankful for the seek advice from with both the social employee and genetic counselor as they served us to figure out the proper sperm bank to use, hazards of deciding upon sure donors, as very well as get us thinking about how a great deal we wanted to share with our families, and how to discuss to our young children when they get older and start having inquiries about their donor and their conception.


Which route is right for you?

IUI vs IVF Fertility Treatment


Setting up IUI Fertility Remedy

Soon after my fertility checks all arrived again obvious, we have been offered the clearance to order our sperm vials and have some sent to the office in anticipation of insemination working day. I did take some fertility prescription drugs to promote my ovaries to develop additional than one particular egg, with the hope that it would raise the prospects of 1 of them having (as we had been doing IUI).

On Oct 23rd, we went to Illume’s Norwalk office environment for our IUI method. Of course, we were incredibly anxious the two weeks soon after our IUI to see if it was successful, and ended up having an at-house pregnancy exam a couple times just before bloodwork confirmed it. We each cried when we saw “pregnant” on the test!

Fortunately, I obtained pregnant on the to start with attempt, which we know is an extraordinary blessing, as it does not happen for all people.

Just one little one or two?

After I bought my bloodwork back confirming the pregnancy, we could not support but notify all of our immediate spouse and children users.

For Nicole’s aspect of the family, it was a seriously significant deal, as this pregnancy would carry their initially grandkids/great grandkids/niblings. My side of the family members was also incredibly fired up, and my brother and his family members ended up energized to at last have niblings given that their possess youngsters ended up ages 2 and 6 at the time.  

When we obtained my 1st bloodwork outcomes and they instructed us our beta HCG selection, Nicole immediately experienced the intestine emotion that maybe we had been possessing additional than a person little one. Two months afterwards when we had our to start with ultrasound, we observed out that we were, in truth, acquiring TWINS!

Be aware: Intrauterine insemination (IUI) and some fertility remedies can raise your possibilities of owning twins. Generally go over the execs and cons of distinctive treatment method procedures with your health practitioner in advance of starting your journey.


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Pics: Megan & Nicole’s twin ladies, Charlotte & Spencer.


Our Twin Pregnancy Knowledge

I had a really unremarkable and straightforward being pregnant. We decided to retain the sexes of our twins a top secret for us to find out in the shipping and delivery space. We were certain that at least 1 of them was heading to be a boy. To our comprehensive shock, we had been blessed to have two remarkable little ladies: Charlotte Poppy and Spencer Annabeth, born mid-June 2022.

They came a few months early, and invested a short stint in the NICU, but have been flourishing due to the fact currently being residence. They just turned one particular thirty day period old and handed their due day. All of our loved ones and friends are completely obsessed with them, and while we are biased, we consider they are the cutest babies in the globe.

What We’ve Realized About LGBTQ+ Relatives Building

The full procedure of our fertility treatment plans at Illume was so extraordinary, and we have advisable the practice to all of our LGBTQ+ pals. We have also advisable Illume for our straight close friends and loved ones customers as they begin to consider having small children, to look into the genetic tests to be certain that their genetics do not clash in means that can induce complications for their potential youngsters.

We remarkably endorse reaching out to other LGBTQ+ family members and understanding about their fertility journey and studying about the diverse possibilities you have to create your spouse and children, as properly as getting somebody as a assistance procedure to discuss factors by with so you know that you are not alone.


Hear from far more LGBTQ+ moms:

Kassie & Sam's IVF Journey


We also hugely advocate taking total benefit of the insights that Illume’s social worker and genetic counselor can present. They were integral in our fertility procedure! Without the need of their enable, I never consider we would have had the similar self esteem in our selection of sperm donor, agreeing on what we are inclined to share with our buddies and family members, and how we will discuss to our children in the future about how they came to be.

We still have a handful of sperm vials left for long term pregnancies, and appear ahead to doing work with the workforce at Illume all over again when we are all set to extend our family. Proper now, our twin women are maintaining our arms full!

Editor’s Notice: A huge thank you to Megan and Nicole for sharing their journey to motherhood with us. We’re so grateful to all of the LGBTQ+ families who choose to share their encounters and insights with our community. Want to share your tale? Concept us on Instagram to discover more!

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